I really liked this guy. i liked him a lot but i didnt want to do anything with him. He knew i liked him. one day he told me to follow him stupid me i did. when i got there he pulled me and pushed me into a corner. he started to unzip my pants so i told him to stop. he said no. and kept on. then after he stoped feeling me. he pushed me down to his dick and made me suck i couldnt scream. i tried but he found ways to make me stop he kept on hurting me. then he lifted me up and i kept saying stop it but he wouldnt and put his dick inside me and did it to me. I told the police but they did nothing. becuase the guy who did it to me kept on lying on what happend.

-Ashley

I was only in the 4th grade when this all happend...I was only 8...not a care in the world...my mom had remarried b/c my dad had passed away...I remember it like it was yesterday...my step dad had called me into the room to put some medicine on my back, and of course i lifted up the back of my shirt...seeing how nothing bad could come out of it...I just wanted to get some bumps off of my back...well that soon turned out the wrong way...he then took down my pannie and me being 8 did not have a clue what was going on...he kept me entertained with movies while he was raping me...at that age I had no clue what sex was so I thought nothing of it...after the whole thing was done...I went into my room and thought to myself what he was doing to me...then i realized that my step dad had raped me...a few days pass...and he cuts my hair like my mom wanted me too...after that he told me to turn around and he took my pannies...this time i knew what he was doing...i cried and screamed while he was taking away my innocence...my little sister and step brother were in the living room and nobody came to my help...while they were watching t.v..my step dad was raping me inside of the bathroom...ever since that night I wish that my memories of that night would erase...he likes to molest my sister and I...my mom knows of it but she does nothing of it...I soon moved out of the house and currently living with my fiance...soon to be married...I told him about what had happen to me..and why I am so aggressive when guys try to touch me...sometimes I wish he would die and leave my family alone...

-Anonymous

My story isn't a very complicated one, and what happened to me isn't something that everyone can say that they've been through, and I know it's a horrible experience to go through, but I know that it's helped me become a new person, a more understanding person who can judge a character a lot better.

I was 13, a 7th grader in my middle school, had a lot of friends, and was as happy as could be. The only thing I had a problem with was family, that's it. I went to religion, and they were there. They didn't actually have to be there, but they were helping out with classes and stuff since they went to that school when they were their age. The visited often to see me and stuff. Anyway, my best friend, Britney was there and there was this guy Ryan with her. He was tan, handsome, blonde hair with spikes in it, very built. He was a lacrosse player for his town's team, and a good one at that. He saw me, and he came over to me. He introduced himself as Ryan. Didn't give me a last name or anything, and when I told him my name, he didn't want my last name, just my first name. So, that night led to us hanging out, which lead to us eventually going out. He was a great boyfriend. He'd leave me little love notes saying how much he cared about me in my backyard, do those kind of romantic things.

Our first date we went to MSG. I'm a big hockey fan, I love the sport. what can I say. He bought us tickets right behind the Rangers box, and I was loving it in every way possible. The only thing was he was an islander fan, so he almost gotten beat up a few times. I slept over Britney's house because her parents were home, and I didn't want my parents finding out I was in the city. It was a saterday so I just said I spent the day with her. They had no idea who ryan was, no idea about any of this. I snuck out of the house a lot to see him. Well, he dropped me back home and we shared our first kiss. It was amazing. I felt it all the way in my knees. I had a big smile on my face and went in the house and couldn't sleep the rest of that night.

The next day there was a party I went to. When we were there, he had gotten a little drunk, but I was far worse. Then his friend, Steve was driving. He was just as drunk as me. Once again I told my mom I was sleeping over Britney's house so they dropped us off there. Britney was even worse than me as far as I remember. Well, after we got out of the car, There was a car accident. Ryan escaped without a scratch, but steve died that night. It was probably the worst thing I ever had to go through, and ever since that night I never had a drink since then.

Well, the next few months me and ryan were still together. He had been making me feel so special, and I loved everything about him. The way he was always there for me whenever I needed him, how he'd get me out of the house whenever I needed to get out, everything. Then, he started getting really really touchy with me. I didn't like this one bit, and I talked to him about it over and over and he didn't listen. I broke up with him one night, and he was crushed. You could hear it in his voice. The next few weeks, he kept calling my house, which got me really mad because he knows my mom didn't know who he was, and I didn't want her to find out. So I finally called him back, and he appologized to me over and over about how much he missed me, so me being the sucker I am, I gave into it and I took him back. There was about 2 and 1/2 weeks since we broke up. It was the week of valentines day, so it was on a saterday this year. He told me that he had a big surprise for me, and I was really excited. I was sleeping over britney's house that night apparently, and then he came by to take me.

When britney saw him walk in the door, she went over to him and asked if she could talk to him alone for a minute. So I was sitting there, waiting and excited. I guessed britney wanted to know where he was taking me, the details, everything. So, then he came back and asked me if I was ready. So we went into his car, and he put a blindfold on my eyes. He took my hand, took me out of the car, and we were walking and I still couldn't see anything. Then, he took off the blindfold, and I was in the middle of the park. The sky was beautiful, you could see stars for miles across. I'm the biggest star fanatic you've ever seen in your life. There are stars all over my room, and I love it. So anyway, moving on that night he had like a table set up with food and everything, a candle lit dinner. It was amazing. Then, he had this beautiful blanket with stars all over it and we sat down there. He was holding me tight, and we were looking all over. Then he started kissing me, and I was happy. Then, I looked at him and kissed him passionatley, and then I pulled back, saying "Thank you for everything. I love you." He looked at me, and these words are always there right now. He said, "I love you too. You saved me." then I said "From what?" then he said "from almost losing you." Then, he pushed me down on the ground, kissing me. I started saying, take it easy, it was only a week since we gotten back together. Then he put his arms down and started holding me to the ground, lying on top of me. Then, he sat up, looking in his pocket taking out a little packet that had a condom in it. I looked over at him, laughed, and said, "No way hon, I'm definitely too young for that." He looked at me, smiled. Then he started to unzip his pants. I said no again, and he didn't listen, and put on the condom. I looked at him and said, "I'm serious! I'm not doing that!" Then he said to me "Well, I'm ready wether you are or aren't. You brought this upon yourself." Then he stood up, I tried to stand up and run away, and he slapped me in the face, and

I hit the ground hard. I had cuts all over my arms, luckily nothing on my face though except for a little cut. I touched it and I felt the blood. I couldn't move, I was too weak. He picked me up, put me back on the blanket, and unziped my pants, taking them off throwing them on the ground. Then he dug into me, I screamed in pain, trying to fight back, screaming no at the top of my lungs, not knowing what else to do. I kept trying to push him off me, but I was too weak, and everytime I attempted to he hit me again. Then, I heard sirens, and he did too, so he got up and started running. I grabbed my pants and started sprinting out of sight. I was limping, pain running through me as I did this, but I didn't know where I was or anything. I found an area underneath a table and put my clothes back on, and waited for the sirens to stop and waited an hour until the coast was clear. Then I looked around and called Britney, asking her to come pick me up. She knew where I was because Ryan had told her.

After that day, I stopped talking to my friends for a while. They all started getting creeped out and most of them stopped talking to me. I cried myself to sleep, and when I slept all I saw was his image there. It took me about 7 months to recover. I didn't tell my parents, I didn't tell anyone. I was too ashamed, and I felt it was my fault. Why did I go that night? Why did I tell him I loved him? Why did he hurt me like that? A year went by, then my grandpa died, making me even more depressed. I finally recovered, changed person, and finally found friends again in 9th grade when I joined the marching band of my school.

I met this one guy, very sweet, and I didn't know why but I felt something strange when I was around him. We started getting close, but I tried to stay pretty distant the first few weeks. Then I had a softball game at my school, and he decided to come. I was walking to the field, and from behind me I heard, "Wow, there's a great butt." I turned around, thinking it was the guy I was talking about, but to my surprise, it was ryan. He had a lacrosse game at the school. Now, remember, this is two years later, so just imagine the shock I was in when I saw this guy. "What? I don't get a hug? anything?" I looked, and I couldn't move. I looked him in the eyes, and man, he looked good. Better than I looked.

"I don't want to talk to you." was all I could say. I started walking to the field again and he was there, looking at me, walking behind me. "I said I don't want to talk to you!" I turned around and yelled. Then I kept walking and he kept going on saying stuff like what's the matter? Didn't we have fun. I told him I didn't, and that I didn't want to see him anymore. Then I sprinted away. I started warming up at the field, while he was running on the track, looking at me. The started blowing kisses to the girls from the team we were facing. They went to the same school. I wanted to go over to them and just say "Stay away from him, he's a rapist." But I couldn't. The guy I liked was sitting in the bleechers, and he liked me back. That game, it was the last inning, bases loaded. His game had just finished, and he was standing by the side. He blew a kiss to me, and I stepped out of the batters box and called time. I took a deep breath, saying to myself that he couldn't hurt me and there was nothing he could do to me. I stepped back in the box, memories from that day popping into my mind, hearing his voice telling me to shut up, telling me that he loved me too. Saying he was ready. I thought to myself, are you ready for this. I swung the bat and hit a triple, bringing in all the runners, but we lost by one run. The guy I liked walked me back to the door, asked me if I wanted anything to drink, then walked away. I walked into the building and walked passed the band room and went to my locker, and there he was, and he pinned me against the wall.

"Ryan, get off me!" I kept screaming it, loud. He kept saying, "what didn't you miss me?" or "We had fun last time we saw each other, didn't we?" I got away from him, grabbed my bat, and hit him in the back of the knees making him fall to the ground. I held the bat in my hand, and hit him again with it. He squirmed back, like a coward. I started screaming stuff like, why can't you hit me? because I'm prepared right now? are you that much of a coward that you can only hit me when I least expect it? then he squirmed back more. I put the bat down and froze. I told him if he ever came near me again I would press charges on him. He got up, looked at me, gave me a kiss on the cheek. "It was a beautiful relationship. I'm sorry." and then walked away.

After that day, I saw him twice more, I was in a bagle shop with my mom and he was standing behind me. I started freaking out to myself, but I didn't let my mom see. Then I saw him drive past my house, I stopped infront of a random house because we moved from when he knew where my house was. He waved but I didn't do anything else. I stopped infront of someone elses house instead. But I know now what to do incase he ever comes back to hurt me again, but as of now, I'm slowly moving on again, returning back to normal life.

I'm a totally different person from when this happened to me. I've become more mature, and I am more carful of who I date now incase something like this happens again, and i'm prepared just in case. Now I know though, he can't hurt me again, and I know that it isn't my fault anymore. He can't hurt me. He won't hurt me. I won't let him. He's off to college now, while I'm a sophmore in my high school. My parents still don't know, and I regret not going to the police or anything, but there's nothing I can do anyway. All I want to say throughout all this is if it happens to you, report it right away. Out of everything in my life, I regret this. Not telling anyone about it. Now it's 3 years later, and I can't do anything about it. I'm moving on, and I still see him even though he isn't there physically. He haunts me, but with the help of my friends, I'm moving forward.

-Anonymous

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